Story of My Life Pt. 17 by Jake McClintick 3/19/19
Only love is not most easy. So need help God. Not only myself to think about, supposed to think how I help others. Not my strength since I not have much freedom my autism.
So much love to make happy those I love. Most time I not do that since I can’t make myself respond like they can. Try to, I can’t. So not sure what I supposed to do.
Most not want to have bad thoughts, but hard not to. So I need help learning love instead of hate myself. Really not hate everything about myself, not sure most love everything either.
Sorting out these opposite thoughts not easy. So have to really trust in myself and God’s reason for my autism. Not sure I can do so much for others. Not most happy about that.
At the age of 22 he began expressing his very personal thoughts and feelings more fluently with me (his mom), and it was his idea to begin writing “The Story of My Life” one day. This was his 17th entry to that story.
Jake is diagnosed with severe autism as well as intermittent explosive disorder. He has given me permission to share his story and our conversations. He continually expresses his desire to “find purpose” to his life…I hope his willingness to share will help others learn about this misunderstood condition known as “autism” that has so much to teach us all.
Jake, I have often wondered about my purpose in life. Sometimes I feel I don’t have much to offer to others. You remind me that we can always chose to love others, with God’s help. I think love is the best gift we have to offer to others. Thanks for the reminder!
Jake, you helped me by writing this and sharing your thoughts!! Thank-you!!!